Greetings, Earthlings

It’s been so long since we have updated!  We have been almost non-stop since we have been back.  And honestly, I can probably categorize our entire two months of being back into three parts— recovery, travel, and job-hunting.

Our recovery has been interesting.  Looking back, I think that we have gone through all of the stages of grieving post-return.  Grieving for the time we spent there, and grieving in our absence.  I didn’t think of it that way while going through it, but as I’m starting to emerge out of the fog, I can see that is the case. Even though it is messy and choppy, we are slowly learning more about how our time in Africa has shaped us as we reflect upon the experience we were able to have.

I wish that I could tell you exactly how it affected us, how we think about it now, and how it will influence our future.  That would be nice.  Realistically though, we are still learning these things ourselves, and to be honest, sometimes we avoid thinking about it because of the good and painful memories alike. 

If I could describe our current over-all conditions (although our days vary of course), I would say that we feel like lost, confused people.  We have yet to find our place in this little world, and don’t exactly know even where to look.  We are occupying our time with the things that we know how to (the named categories above), but when I think about our futures, all I see is a blank slate. 

Not only have we been recovering emotionally, but as you all are far too aware of yourselves, life in the states can be complicated.  In comparison to Africa, I feel like we have to fill out a form for everything we do! 

Call this and that company, pay this fee, fill out your information to pay for a purchase, enter this form to use this website to connect you to another website which is really just a search engine to connect you to a hundred other websites that you have to sign up for individually to enter your information to connect you with jobs in your area that you may or may not qualify for and that may or may not actually exist.  Its crazy!  So much for being a discreet citizen.  I was used to it before, and now we are having to adjust to it all over again. 

We came back to a pile of unanswered mail, left-over tax and insurance problems that were supposedly taken care of before we left, and all new issues to tackle on our entrance back into this very well-recorded and well-controlled society.  After just having finished reading the Hunger Games trilogy, it makes me wonder….

Aside from our emotional, physical, and technological recoveries, we have been able to travel through NC several times to see my family, Columbia to see friends and family, and we are heading to Charleston this weekend for my cousins wedding!

Right now, we are living in Elliston, VA with Drew’s dad and step-mom, Tree.  They have been incredible.  They have been very understanding to our ever-changing lifestyle, and have done a great job of taking care of us.  We are planning on staying in this area as far as we know, and as we build up some financial credibility, we will start to look for a place of our own.

Now for job-hunting.  After submitting approximately 25-30 applications (not including temp agencies) over the last month and a half, I finally was hired last week by Ann Taylor LOFT.  Although this isn’t a permanent career choice, I am really grateful for the job and am definitely enjoying it so far (the clothing discounts won’t hurt either!).  Drew is looking for jobs in carpentry as well, and we are hoping that something comes to fruition soon.

We have started visiting a few churches and have connected with a couple of Drew’s old friends (yay Carrie and Bennett!), so we feel like slowly, ever so slowly, we will find our bearings soon. 

We are grateful for all of you who have done a great job loving us since we have returned….for those of you who have asked great questions and been interested in our time in Africa, and our recovery upon return.  We are going to attach some pictures of our goodbyes and the celebration we shared with Seeds of Hope (and have plenty of other pictures we will attach in the future), but please feel free to e-mail us, leave a comment, or call us with any more questions you have about our time there! 

Love to all,

Julianna (on behalf of Drew too)

Saying goodbye to Bishop Alexis and his children in Gahini, Rwanda.

Leaders in the diocese (from left to right):

Jered: Secretary of diocese

James: Manager of Seeds of Peace

Drew: Manager of Seeds of Hope

Alfred: Director of Seeds of Peace and Seeds of Hope

Our friend Hope with her daughter Providence.  She worked in a little local hardware shop that Drew and I frequented.

Us with our goodbye gifts, made my our Muslim friend from the market, Baraka.  

Great friends from church on our last Sunday.  The woman to my left didn't speak any English, but joined my class and did so well!  She was so diligent, and when I left she couldn't stop crying and thanking me.

My little friends from across the fence.  Teaching them how to smile BIG since they never smile in pictures.

The little one, seen above on my hip.

Us with our assistant manager, Francois, on the day we left Nyagatare.

At the Seeds of Hope celebration the night before we left.  One friend took me to get my hair done, and another let me borrow their traditional dress (a great honor).

Everyone enjoying the meal.

Drew making his goodbye speech (even the Africans told him to stop talking...it must have been long haha).

Receiving our gift of the Bible in Kinyarwanda from Pastor Bernard and a deacon of the church we attended in Nyagatare.  

Giving our second gift (the first being the meal) to Francois, the assistant manager, who was accepting it for all the employees at Seeds of Hope.  It was several pictures in a frame of us with the employees.  

I am reaching my left arm to touch my right, which is a sign of respect when you shake hands with the elderly, or those above you in status.  

Saying goodbye to our World Race friends just a couple days before we flew out in Kigali, Rwanda.

Here we are standing in front of a fun little restaurant started by a Canadian called "Mr. Chips".  It was the only burger joint in the country!

We have other pictures of before/after renovations, the town, and other people that we will post sometime over the next month or two.  Hope you enjoyed!

January 6: News

Hello Everyone,

I know that this will come as a surprise to some of you, but below we have copied a letter that we recently sent out to our supporters via e-mail.



Friends and Family,

We have mixed feelings about the following information. As you know, we have been working in Nyagatare, Rwanda since August. We committed to a year of service to the Anglican Diocese here, specifically working with the Seeds of Hope Conference Center and the Morning Star Primary School. Our time here as been challenging and stretching for both Julianna and I in more ways than we can ever express.

The initial purpose of our coming here was to fulfill an internship requirement for my Intercultural Studies degree. The second purpose was to help the Rwandan Anglican Church with some of its ministries. The time frame for the internship only required 6-8 weeks for completion, but we decided to stay a year in order to gain longer-term experience and make our work here as optimum as possible.  My internship was an involved process with both work before and during our time here.  My last requirement for the internship was a mandatory debrief session with my advisers from Columbia International University in order to process everything that has gone on during the internship; internal struggles, external struggles, successes, failures, progress made, and areas that need improvement. After the debrief, my requirements would be fulfilled, and then we would continue on as planned for the remainder of the year.

During this debrief session Julianna and I talked with three of the most respected missionaries that I know.  After speaking with them, we were surprised when they called us back. They were concerned enough about our experiences here that we should end our time and come home.  We asked further questions and discussed it more with them, and basically, they were telling us that because of various circumstantial factors, it would be unwise to stay for the entire year. Even more, they strongly suggested that we come home as soon as possible. Please note, that our lives are not in danger, nor are we in harms way physically, but they primarily suggested to come home in order to preserve our emotional, mental, and spiritual health in the long run.

Julianna and I listened to what they had to say and agreed to talk, fast, and pray about this decision. After much consideration we decided to submit to the wisdom of our advisers seeing that they are wise, experienced, and seasoned missionaries who are more familiar with the effects of cross-cultural ministry than we are.  We also agreed in our hearts, and what they said resonated very strongly with what we had been feeling for the duration of our time here.  We have discussed this with our families and they agree as well that it would be a mistake to ignore the advise of such wise counsel. So, in short, Julianna and I are coming home.

At the onset of this letter I said that we have mixed feelings about this decision; this is so true. Honestly, it is one of the hardest decisions we have had to make as a couple. There are so many reasons why we would want to stay. We had it programmed in us to be here for a year, and now we are having to pull the e-brake on our plans.  We are so happy to come home to see our friends and families, but also our hearts are sad that we will leave the friends we have here. We have been planning to come here since 2010 and have worked diligently for five months trying to minister, help, improve, grow, disciple, etc., but now we are leaving before we intended.

Proverbs 16 has been an encouragement to me remembering that "In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps."  We have planned to serve the Lord, and that we have done, but it looks much different than we had thought, and we are learning to be OK with that. Also Julianna and I agree with the wisdom a Rwandese friend gave me on this subject. He reminded me about 1 Corinthians 3. Paul says to the Corinthians,

              " I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything but only God, who makes things grow. The man who plants and the man who waters have one purpose, and each will be rewarded according to his own labor, For we are God's fellow workers; and you [the church] are God's field, God's building." 

Julianna and I, though it is difficult, cannot be discouraged because of unfinished work, for it is all the work of God. We have done our best, and God knows that, but ultimately he is the foreman, he is the head farmer, he is the ultimate friend, lover, sustainer, helper, brother, father, mother, creator, etc. Our work pales in comparison to His, which is encouraging to us. My humanity, my finiteness is not a thing to pitied or to apologize for, because my imperfection and finiteness is what separates me from God.  Instead of seeing ourselves as weaker, we must see God as Greater. We pray that God will give us the grace to do so.

We want to also assure our friends and supporters that our time here has been far from useless.  Even though we accomplished vastly less than we intended to in details and specifics here in Rwanda, we are not leaving empty-handed.  We accomplished my internship, which allowed me to officially graduate, we learned a host of information on language, culture, and people in general.  Not only that, but we have gained a completely new perspective about the mission field and what it is like to live on it.  It has given us a new filter to use when planning for the future; in fact, our perspectives of the future have narrowed significantly, which is a very good thing when you are young and it seems like there are a world of endless possibilities.  We know ourselves, our giftings, our passions, and our abilities much more keenly than we did before (we know what we are not meant for as well).  We have been able to participate in and learn how to live in a Christian community that is very much unlike ours. 

We want to thank all of you for all of the sacrifices that many of you have made to allow us to come here.  Even though it has been a very difficult time, as a whole this experience has been a deep and meaningful one; we have learned so much.  We are praying that you all would be able to extend us grace in this time for our weaknesses.  Please continue to pray for us, not only until we come home, but also after, as we will be trying to get on our feet again and re-evaluate for the future. As far as our financial supporters are concerned, we will not be asking for support after this month. Thank you for your generosity, it has not been unfruitful.

If you have more specific questions, we would love to answer them and share more details of our time here that we have withheld.  Please either call or e-mail us when we get back, or just talk to us when we can see you in person.



We love you all, and are continually grateful for you,

Drew and Julianna



I know that many of you have enjoyed and been encouraged by our blog posts about our time here. We are sorry that we will not be able to continue that, but we trust that God will still be able to use us back in the States.


This is not the end of our blog either. I am sure that for some time to come, we will be posting memories, stories, or thoughts about our time here, as well as general life back in the states. We hope that it will be continually beneficial to our greater community even though our time here has ended.


Thank you all for your encouraging e-mails, phone calls, and comments.  Your encouragement means more to us than you can know. 


I'm sure we will post again sometime after our return, and until then, any questions that you have that you think would be appropriate to the public we would be more than happy to answer.


Grace and Peace to all!

Update

Sorry about all the posts with the holiday pictures.  I didn't realize that you could upload more than one picture on a post until the last one. 

We are doing ok, but still need a lot of prayer from everyone.

Also, Julianna has been really sick and after doing some tests, not only does she have a bad stomach infection, but also some parasites.  So pray that the medicine works and she can get better.

Photo: Our trip to Uganda

We last minute decided to take a trip to Uganda since business was almost non-existant at the Seeds of Hope.  It is something that we have been wanting to do for awhile.  A friend in Kigali told us about a rafting company called "adrift" that has a great deal on both sleeping, food, and rafting accomidations.  So the day after Christmas we left on the night bus and were gone three nights (two of which were spent on a bus) and two days.  It was not restful at all, but it was so FUN!  And we have needed that.  We will probably post more pictures of the rafting in the future. 

The bus ride was so long-- we literally left 8 hours late.  Yes 8.  With no warning or explanation....oh Africa.....Even after 8 hours of waiting we had a 12 hour ride ahead of us, which we weren't sure we would come out of alive.

A picture of the Nile river that flows all the way to Egypt!  Hopefully you've heard of it before...We stayed in a place right on it, and the rafted down it the next day.  It was incredible!  Especially after living in the hottest spot in Rwanda.  By the way, I'm really sorry that I just figured out how to post more than one picture at a time, or I would have combined all of our holiday pictures in one post.  That was my origional intent anyway...

These pictures were taken in Kampala, Uganda.  Not our favorite place in the world.  It was an absolute mad house!

Taken in Jinja, Uganda, where we stayed and did the rafting.

Photo: Christmas lunch with Eddie and Bonita

Christmas morning Drew preached in English service.  After that we got a bus to Kigali, which is about 4 hours away, and got to spend the rest of Christmas day with the family of Eddie and Bonita that we have mentioned before.  They have ministered to us several times since we have come to Rwanda.  We had such a great day eating a delicious meal and snacks that actually was a Christmas meal that we are used to!  Then we had a movie marathon and spent the night with them.  It was so needed, and we were very blessed by their hospitality and generosity.

Photo: Christmas Eve with Friends

We had the great privilege of meeting a team of Americans (a VERY rare treat) that are passing through Nyagatare on what is called "The World Race".  This is an mission organization that sends teams to 11 different countries in 11 months.  Even though they were grateful for bits and pieces of home during the holidays when they are missing home, I definitely think they blessed us so much more with their presence.  It was so incredible to be able to speak English freely, share stories and burdens, and just be with people who are part of our own culture.  This is the team in our room sharing a Christmas Eve feast.

Photo: Staff Christmas Party 2

Our staff enjoying the treats.  My mom sent enough small candy canes to share with them the Christmas beauty of hot chocolate with candy canes in it.  The funny thing was that they got really confused and most of them ended up taking the candy canes out and throwing them away anyway haha, no matter how hard I tried to explain to just leave it in there.  During the party we had food, Bible readings, songs, and speeches (you can't have a party in Rwanda without speeches).

Photo: Staff Christmas Party

Our accountant, and pasor's wife, Antoinette, with some of the Christmas festivities for our staff Christmas party.  Since most employees would be gone for holidays, we had the celebration on the 22nd. 

Photo: Our Christmas Tree

This is our second Christmas tree together!  It doesn't look like much, but we are thankful to have something.  Mom sent the cute white and red ribbon.  Drew of course made the little stand for it. 

Photo: The Christmas Wreath We Made

We tried our hand at wreath-making for the first time.  It was pretty enjoyable.  Mom gave us some good decorations for the inside, but this was our solution for the outside.

It was funny because I also had garland on the window sill outside next to it, but the next day it was gone.  I'm pretty sure the workers thought it was trash and took it haha. 

December 18: Lifestyle Changes 4-6

Hugs
Hugging is one of the many awkward experiences that a Westerner may have when living in Rwanda. When the Rwandese hug, they do this sort of reaching out to touch each others shoulders thing, followed by a hand shake. As you know, in America it is almost always one or the other. For the longest time I could never tell which one they were going for, and it made for some really awkward situations. Especially when I would just go in for the kill when I saw they wanted a hug, but then realized that they were keeping me at a distance. Then I would be so distracted by the fool I just made out of myself that I didn't notice the fact that I completely left them hanging on the whole hand-shake follow. Not to mention, whenever they shake hands, they don't intertwine the thumbs (whether you have noticed or not, we do that). They just sort of touch their hands, wrists, or forearms together. I have now perfected the method though, and wonder if I won't accidentally carry it on back in America.

Bugs
There are actually relatively few strange creatures that we deal with (thankfully). The most common are lizards (everywhere), small thick black spiders, mosquitoes and other flying pests (of course), and giant toads. Iman Ishimye (praise God) that there has only been one sighting of a snake. It was a two-headed snake that Andrew quickly got control of and cut both heads off of.

Anyway, about our second month here, we started getting dozens of bites a night, even though we were using the mosquito net. I was just positive every day that I would get Malaria because I thought they were mosquito bites. We finally realized that they couldn't be, as they were on every part of the body, even those covered with clothing. We ruled out bed bugs, and finally figured out that they were fleas. Drew had been making friends with a dog, and shortly after we started having this problem. Two weeks ago we took an entire day and using boiling water, washed, literally, every cloth item that we owned. Bags, rags, suitcases, shoes, clothing--EVERYTHING. Thankfully we have incredible workers that helped us. It was such an intense job, especially because everything is done by hand and then air dried. Not to mention it was boiling hot. When the storms started, we had to bring everything in and then put them back out when the sun came out again. We are now flea free though! Hopefully it will stay that way.

Thugs
I really only made this category because I couldn't think of anything else relevant that rhymed with "hugs" and "bugs," but actually, I suppose I have been exposed to this category. Technologically (I'm not referring to other ways), Rwanda is decades and decades behind America. Usually (though not always), crime in America is complicated and organized. Our movies consist of the most intense and complicated crime plots ever. Here, it seems like their crime is simple. They need something, so they take it.

Their way of dealing with crime is also fascinating. The court system is not nearly the thing that it is in America. I know that it exists, but I haven't heard a word about it, or seen any effects of it since we have been here. It seems like the way they deal with local crime is relatively primal. While our first impulse after a theft is to call the police, here that is not the case. If a thief is caught, those around him deal with him as they see appropriate to the crime. Usually the crime is theft, and the punishment is a good beating. Drew and I have experienced watching this a couple of times, actually. Just a week ago we were at the bus stop waiting, when we saw a crowd of people about 20 feet away from us shouting. We realized quickly that they were beating up some young man. I have never experienced anything like that. I grew up with all women, and we didn't even wrestle (Except for my sister Katie Beth, who beat me up on one or two occasions)! It was so surreal. After all the violent movies I have been exposed to, a "simple" beating really shook me up. There is something about seeing someones flesh actually being affected by the attacks of others in real life; hearing what it sounds like for someone to be kicked full force in the back or stomach. To see the real pain and anguish in someones face as they are outnumbered by a laughing crowd. I felt so helpless.

In some sense, you can see how they would have more "justice" than we have here in America. What happens for us is that the criminals get a slap on the wrist and maybe sent to jail for some time, where they bide their time until their release. There is no immediate gratification for the person that was affected. You can see how those here would feel as though justice had been served, and in earthly terms, it has been. It also shows how they think about community in keeping each other accountable. Even so, for someone who is used to what we would call "civilized" justice, it was a shock. I am very thankful that when I sin, that God does not see it, and expose it to the world for a public beating (although sometimes metaphorically that does happen). Instead, He shows me unmeasurable grace over and over again.

Julianna

Photo: Going out for a nice anniversary dinner

So here's the story.  Completely characteristic of Drew's and my current record, all of our anniversary plans failed miserably:) Origionally we were going to take a reunion road trip (we went on a road trip for our honeymoon), but he couldn't get the motorcycle he has been fixing up and running in time, because business has been so heavy.  Then we had planned another couple of things, but had some unexpected expenses come up, so we just decided to stay here and spend the day Sunday together, as its our usual tradition to do that anyway.  We thought spending it in our cozy little room talking about memories would be great.  As life on the mission field sometimes goes, we ended up entertaining guests for the majority of the day, so by the time we actually got out to go to dinner, it was dark, and thus the bad lighting.  We had a great time though, and we still got to spend good time together.  I told Drew, "who cares about all those 1-year anniversary traditions anyway?  The cake would have freezer burn, and I would end up crying because I had gained weight and couldn't fit in my dress anymore."  We always have fun when we are together, and therefore it was a wonderful day over-all!

Photo: After church on our anniversary. Drew preached and did great!

Photo: Drew's wrapping job for my anniversary gift. Classic.

November 21: After our First Anniversary : )

It is difficult for me to describe what one year married to the greatest man on the planet is like. I mean, its a privilege that only I have in all the world, so how can I even begin? Although I know my attempt will be far too inadequate, I will do my best.


Being married to Drew means:

 
-Having an incredible example of love and service for others. Every day.

-Being completely assured of his faithfulness and commitment to me. He is the most loyal person I know.

-I am appreciated for the work I do. He is always thanking me for cleaning, washing, cooking, etc.

-I get to be married to someone with whom I have so much in common, as far as interests go. I love that we love to do the same things. We have had some of the greatest times together on road trips, bummy movie days, camping trips, playing cards, going on walks, cooking together, etc etc etc.

-I am consistently encouraged to continue in my personal pursuits.

-If anyone heard him raving about my cooking, they would think that my food was comparative to the work of the greatest chef on planet earth. At the end of almost every meal he says, "This is the best meal you've ever made." I can't tell if he has found some way to justify saying that, or if miraculously my cooking skills are increasing every day.

-I get to be married to such a stud (he is so handsome!).

-I can confront him with various problems without fear of his being too easily offended, and with the assurance that he will do his very best to change.

-I am exposed to the quirkiest and most incredibly random actions ever. Seriously, I wish any one person could experience this aspect of my life.

-I never have to worry about him being vain or conceited. Haha this is sometimes to a fault, and I have to assign his brother to remind him to shave and shower for our wedding day:)

-I never have to call a plumber, electrician, mover, or handy-man to fix or do anything. Any kind of problem we have with our various homes, he can fix it.

-Speaking of, I never have to do horrible half-way hanging or decorating jobs anymore. He is great at getting pictures up straight and securely. 

-I am assured that he thinks I'm beautiful (externally and internally).

-I get to experience some of the most genuine and tender acts of service. I could literally list hundreds of them. I have actually kept a list in my journal of many of them and was reading it over yesterday. I will give you one example. This past January, we were taking a group of friends snowboarding up in Boone, NC. Snowboarding is one of Drew's passions, but I don't enjoy it as much because I get so cold and wet. He knew I was worried about it, so after work one day (he always wants to come straight home because he is so tired from working so hard all day), he went scowering all of the relative stores in town looking for ski bibs for me. By the way, he despises shopping. 

-I get to experience the beautiful combination of a realistic, but tending towards optimistic, outlook on life. It perfectly balances my realistic, but tending towards pessimistic viewpoint.

-I never have to be embarrassed because of his being lazy in his work. He is one of the hardest, if not the hardest, worker I know.

-Come to think of it, I never have to be embarrassed of him at all (except because of some of the really, really corny jokes he makes. Especially because the Rwandans don't even remotely get his sense of humor and it makes for some super awkward situations).

-I am forgiven and given exceptional grace over, and over, and over, and over again.

-I can completely be "myself" with him. This is not some weird self-discovery bit, but it just means that he accepts me for all of the various and sundry moods and phases that I go through. If I'm obsessed with avocados, he makes it a point to slip in avocados wherever he can. If I despise avocados because I puked them up, he thinks of all kinds of creative ways to tell people that we really don't want them. If I am very serious and thoughtful, he allows me to have that time and participates in conversations relating to that. If I want to think of every possible stupid dance move and display them while I listen to the i pod in our room, he voluntarily sits there watching and laughing for an hour. 

-I can expect random gifts (even when I don't want them because of spending money) any time that he finds himself out and about alone.

-I am able to watch him consistently grow, mature, and become more and more a mighty man of God.

-Even though he is not a futuristic thinker like me, he will discuss future plans as often as I ask.

-I never have to worry about whether or not he will get along with my friends or family. He loves them all so well in very individual ways. 

-I get to discuss theology with an incredibly wise individual. He puts me to shame with his knowledge of the contents of the Bible paired with his balanced way of thinking.

-I can be confident that anything free he finds (on the side of the road, dumpsters, etc) will come home with him. This is a gift and a curse, but mostly a gift. It means that a good 25% of our possessions we have gotten for free!

-I never have to feel afraid (physically) when I am with him. He is SO strong, and has been ready more than once to fight someone who was antagonizing me. One time I got robbed when I was all alone and I was even more thankful for his protection of me after that.

-If I ask him to help me, he never even hesitates or complains. Much of the time he volunteers it anyway.

-He can keep up intellectually with my deepest philosophical thoughts, and also my dumbest surface-level silliness.

-I am encouraged in my relationship with God and others, without being reprimanded or pushed too hard.

-Plans are fluid for him. If the plans change, or more often if I change my mind, he is 90% of the time up for anything. I never have to worry about him being cranky or complaining about it. He is so flexible and can really make any situation enjoyable.

-In fact, he is up for anything with anyone usually (remember when you took him yard-saling, HJ?).

-I can vent without fear of judgment. That doesn't mean he won't speak the truth to me, in love, but it means that I don't have to be worried about harsh responses.

-I get to hear the sweetest, most genuine comments without being concerned about it being verbal vomit. I really despise (and always have) the mushy gooshy verbal affirmations. But when you have a history with someone and the assurance of a lifetime commitment, everything changes. Especially when the really precious spoken things are much fewer than the actions, you can more assuredly know that they are true (plus, Drew is NOT afraid to tell me the truth or be straight up with me). Let me give one example that I remembered reading back in my journal. One day this past June, I had been really sick and throwing up. We were laying in bed and I said, "Drew, what if I throw up in the bed?" He said very gently, "I would pick you up, take you to the shower, and wash you off. Then I would change the sheets and carry you back to bed." It was so matter-of-fact, but so sweet! I believe with all my heart that is exactly what he would have done.

-I get to have the most wonderful companion for the rest of my life.


I admire and respect you so much, Drew! Happy 1-year anniversary!

Julianna

November 9: Ride to Zaaffran's

This is us in Kigali, the capital, taking some taxi motos to our favorite place to eat in Rwanda. Oddly enough, it is Indian food. It is sort of a get-a-way for us. Taxi motos are our primary means of transportation in Kigali.  They are so much cheaper than the car taxis.

November 6: Marius

I have been reading Victor Hugo's Les Miserables for the last few months. While doing so, I have identified with a certain character from this book, Marius. Marius, for personal and political reasons, refused to receive charity from his grandfather and thus became poor and desolate. After struggling for some years, he worked his way back onto his feet, and is subsequently portrayed as a better man because of his sufferings.

Though our situation is quite different, and though our "sufferings" are better described as adjustments, I found comfort in the words Hugo penned describing Marius. At Marius' lowest point Hugo stated, "He was experiencing what perhaps the earth experiences at the moment when it is sliced with the iron blade so that the grains of wheat may be sown; it feels the wound alone; the thrill of the germ and the joy of the fruit do not come until later" (Hugo). These words described our pain and struggles so accurately that I shivered when I read it. At the onset of our time here, and many occasions since, we have felt in some way or another as Marius did. Even so, there are so many areas of growth that would not have come without first the blade; the initial pain is so minuscule in comparison with the fruit that comes after.

One of these fruits is the broadening of my understanding of the greatness of God. Greatness is, indeed, a vague idea, but it is necessary. However, it is important that our vague understanding of God's greatness comes not from laziness in study, cowardice in conversation, or from a stagnant relationship with God. Instead, it should come from a severe reverie that recognizes God's majesty, love, patience, etc, with the understanding that He is so much greater than our understanding of His majesty, love, patience, etc. These things are the only way in which we can describe or explain him in our human terms and minds, but we should begin our thoughts with the assumption that these are inadequate; He is always exponentially greater in each attribute.

This knowledge of God's greatness increases when I view myself in light of it. For example, in my frustration and impatience, I cannot help but to recognize God's infinite patience; not only with me, which is an unfathomable feat, but also with the entire world. And not only the entire world as it is now, but also with the world from creation until the end of time. All people at all times-- incredible. Similarly, in my hatred I am reminded of God's infinite love. A person who rapes and murders is, by earthly standards, worthy of our scorn and punishment, and on most occasions (whether "Christians" admit it or not), our hatred. God, on the other hand, has extended his love to all people without exception. This is somehow simple yet perplexing. It is a lesson for a child as well as a phenomenon to shudder at the thought of. His love is simple enough to comfort and warm a child, yet so complex that we can hold it in juxtaposition with any other example of love and see them pale in comparison.

A glimpse into my heart is this: a person's wounds are real, painful, and sometimes overwhelming. Some wounds are paper cuts, and some wounds are far more painful than any other mortal can sympathize with. However, the wounds of a believer, if tended to correctly, yield fruit, and we can take hope the hand that prunes and slashes is the hand of God.

Drew

October 28: Language Teaching and Learning

Looking back, I believe that we haven't related much information about either our progress in Kinyarwanda, or my students' progress in English. This is such a major part of our time here, so I will give a few glimpses into our experiences in these departments.

Learning Kinyarwanda:

The run down:

Learning Kinyarwanda is going very well for the most part. We are no longer taking lessons three days a week, as our language teacher moved to Gahini. She still comes about every-other-week, so we try to squeeze a lesson or two in during that time. The majority of what we learn comes from asking Frank questions and speaking in everyday life. In that way, most of the introductory level communication is becoming like second nature to us. It will be the next level that will be a challenge.
It is exciting because even though we can speak basics, we can understand much more. We are able to sit in on conversations and at least understand what they are talking about. Our word bank is getting fatter every day!

Stories:

After we adjusted Drew's presentation of me as his "leg," we found out shortly after that the slight adjustment was causing him now to introduce me as his "pair of shoes." haha so now we have gotten it correct for the last month and a half so that the majority of people we know understand that I am his wife.

One of the very confusing parts (out of many) of Kinyarwanda is that their word for "no" is "oya (pronounced 'oh-yea')." This has made for some very awkward situations ranging from the chef asking us if we liked the food to others asking us if we want something. One of those situations was when Frank asked Drew if he loved his wife. Drew answered quite emphatically, "ohhh yeaahhhhhh!!!!!" And everyone in the room just started dying laughing.

Teaching English:

The run down:

As a part of our business strategy, and even for functionality in day-to-day life, we started teaching English classes to the staff 7 weeks ago. We originally split the staff right down the middle into two classes based on their departments so that one department was never left bare. That meant that there were approximately 8 in each class. After about a week, our VERY enthusiastic assistant manager started inviting random people to join the class. I did not turn them out, mainly because I felt as though I couldn't decline when I already had the classroom and the lesson plans and was volunteering my time. It began to be a problem when he continued to bring people from the church, the market, etc. I finally told him after he brought me four new people during week 5, "Francois.....NO MORE NEW STUDENTS. We are too far along in our course to have beginners entering class!" haha so thankfully that has ended. Now I have about 15 students in the second class, while many students in the first class seem to "get a headache" every Tuesday and Thursday at about 2PM, and therefore I am lucky to get five.

I also have been to Morning Star School four times to do observations, but they have finished their exams and are on holiday until late in January. So, unless they ask me to come to teach seminars or anything, I will not go back again until January. I will try to write another time about my experiences there as it would be another big chunk of information.

My Methods:

The focus of the class is not an academic analysis of English. We are not doing much grammar or sentence structure. It is for function with us and with customers. Even so, I am here for a year, and I think after we get through the functional phrases of everyday life and hospitality lingo I will ask them if they want to continue. If so, then we will start to get into the nitty gritty of English. by then, they will have a good foundation to build off of.

Usually, I begin with everyone in the class saying the day and date together and reviewing bits of previous material. Sometimes I have easy ten-question quizzes. Then I present ten (usually) vocabulary words or phrases, and after we review them together and they write them, followed by focused (where they only have to fill in one piece of information) exercises and communicative exercises. Focused exercises are very difficult without access to printers and photocopy machines, so that part is almost always done orally. The communicative exercises are where the fun comes in. I can't even tell you how many hilarious episodes we have had as we practice the words in small groups or in pairs presenting to the class. It seems to have been very effective, and they are becoming more and more confident daily in their greetings and answering questions.

Stories:

Although it is certainly possible to teach a language without direct translations, it is 100x more difficult, in my opinion. Especially when there are not many resources available for pictures, etc. Imagine trying to explain abstract ideas or conjunctions without a translation in their language. You could point to an old woman washing clothes and they could think that you meant so many different options: "old woman" "washing clothes" "she is tired" "black woman" etc. You could point up to the sky and say "sky." They could interpret this as "sun," "clouds," "color blue," "it's going to rain," "weather," etc etc etc. This poses as a problem in countless situations. No matter how much intonation you use, it is so difficult to explain isolated words or parts of a sentence when they don't know the rest of the sentence. There is no frame of reference. Of course you could use 10 examples of what you are trying to communicate so that they are able to glean the word you are trying to communicate, but direct translations are much faster and easier.

Needless to say, I try to get the translations initially and then let them be creative with plugging in other words to model sentences and practicing them communicatively with each other and the class.
One of the most difficult parts of teaching for me is getting proper translations from English to Kinyarwanda. Everyone seems to have their own opinions about what is correct. The funny thing is, sometimes people are on completely different ends of the spectrum. One will say that something is correct, and the only option for being correct, while another says that that is not even remotely close to it.

One such instance was in the very first language lesson I taught. I asked our Kinyarwanda teacher to give me the word for "question" so that I could teach them both "question" and "answer," as those words are used daily in class. She told me that the word for question was "ikibazo." So I taught that word to the entire class and have been using it for the last seven weeks. About a two weeks ago I found out that it was also the word for "problem." That explained why I seemed to be hearing that word constantly. I was fine with the fact that it was used for both problem and question until an English speaker from Seeds of Peace in Gahini came about a week ago and the topic came up. He told me that ikibazo is not used for question at all, but only for problem!! He said another word was that I can't recall. I was a little distressed about this but was hoping that maybe in common use that it was still used for question, as I was recalling the last 5 weeks of asking them to repeat the "problem." The next day I was asking John Claude where one of our workers, Jaci, was. He said with his face scrunched up in thought, tapping the back of his head, "She has a....question...in her head." Oh dear.
Another instance was one day that I was teaching about conditions. We are always asking each other how we are so I was teaching, "tired" "hungry" "sick" "sad" etc. so that they could plug that into the sentence they already knew, "I am fine." It was a list of 10 different words all relating to how one was feeling. One girl, Josianne, in the first class, came in, and after reading the list she came up very quickly and deliberately pointing to the word for "busy," which was "guhuga." She scratched it out and added an "n" so that it was "guhunga." I assumed that must be correct and I had made a mistake since all 10 words were in the same category, therefore she must have inferred what I was trying to say. So I taught the class and everything went fine. When the second class came in, one student from the market who has joined (who speaks very good English, but has wanted to practice listening to my accent) came up and said, "umm... teacher.... you must mean to use 'guhuga.' This word 'guhunga' means to flee the country." haha I just laughed and laughed, and even now the first class tries to correct me when I say "guhuga."

October 22: Business Troubles

Business has been rough since we have been here. We have been making progress in understanding the more intricate details of individual departments, and still, after two months of work, we can't seem to make much profit at all. Honestly the center was run so poorly by a previous manager (who is no longer involved) that we are facing around 250,000 US dollars of debt owed to around 25 different individuals or organizations. We are definitely swimming upstream. It seems like at least every week someone else shows up here wanting the money we owe them, which Julianna and I didn't even know that we owed until that moment! It is so frustrating to see our employees work so hard to make the grounds and the food presentable for guests; and then the little profit that is made is forked over to a butcher that did a favor for the old manager, and now needs the money that was promised to him two years ago. Unfortunately we just discovered that there is documentation for all of the debts so we can't write them off as lying.

Every day the restaurant seems to spend more than what they make because our prices are so low and because of lack of customers. The problem is, as soon as we make less food, we have 30 customers and more than half get upset and leave. So then the next day we make more and no one comes. We can't raise the prices, because if we were to raise the prices out-the-blue without making the renovations first, then we would even loose the few consistent customers that we do have. We usually make enough that if we had 15 customers we could make some profit, but the Rwandese pile their plates so high that only about 10 or 11 get through. It would make sense, but now we don't have the refrigeration or ability as of now to make individual plates by order.

The employees have not been paid for September or October, and just when we think we will be able to pay them, we get the water bill which is 250,000 RWF ( about $500.00). If we don't pay it, then they shut the water off which then makes our clientele even smaller. I won't go into detail about all of the strategies we have been trying to implement that don't cost money (we haven't received the money for renovations yet), but just know that we are doing what we can for now.

With that said, you can imagine how eager we are for business of any kind, whether someone is staying for 3 months or someone is just coming for a cup of tea. Each positive business transaction slowly builds our reputation back up to being a decent business. Today was a busy day, and most everyone on staff was bustling with someone or something, preparing, recording, cleaning, escorting, explaining, and so on. I had just finished fixing some lights that were needed for a meeting taking place tonight in the bungalo when Julianna called me over and told me we had a customer who wanted a room for a few nights. We have been trying to be good examples of customer service (as it is very poor here), so I put on my best face, eager to have another customer and walked over to introduce myself in the best Kinyarwanda I could. "Miliwe, amakuru (Good evening, what's the news)?" I asked, earnestly shaking his hand. He replied as expected "Ni meza, Amakuru Namwe (Its good, and you)?" "Sawa (good)" I said and continued. Rwandese either think it is hilarious or impressive when a mazungu speaks kinyarwanda, and I wasn't sure what he thought yet so i kept going, "Urashaka Icyumba (do you want a room)?" "Yiego (yes)" he said. Then out of desperation, for my word bank was running low, I asked him if he spoke English, "Uvuga Icyongereza?" He did and we laughed and talked a bit as I fumbled for the keys to a few of the rooms. My plan was this: to take him to the nicest rooms first and allow him to see what he could have, and then bring him to the less nice rooms and allow him to choose, hoping that he would be longing to be back in the better rooms.
 
We walked to room A-4 talking about his occupation and our plans at the conference center until my struggling to unlock the door broke our train of thought. This one door lock has a reputation of sticking and tonight I was embarrassed that it was as I was trying to woo this customer into our "nice" rooms. Eventually, Francois, our effervescent assistant manager, saw me struggling and came to help. I was getting ready to run to exchange the key for another when he got it open. "WHEW," I thought, "That was rough, but its OK now we got it open. Now we will show him the room and if he chooses it then we will move him to an identical room with working locks." I was on the right track, but I did not notice until it was too late that Francois wanted to try the lock from the inside. As I showed the customer the room and the bathroom I heard Francois mumbling in French, "mfmdffjn petetre dklnb" and then CLICK-CLACK. He was pleased to find that the door indeed locked from the inside. Unfortunately for me, Francois, and the customer, the door would not unlock from the inside. The "nicest" room became the smallest and most awkward place imaginable. After about ten minutes of Francois and I trying to unlock the door, we gave up and Francois decided to call another worker to bring another key. He dialed her number to call her but realized he did not have any minutes left on his phone. He then turned to me, hand outstretched to use mine. For some reason only known to God, I had put my phone on my desk and not in my pocket, and therefore I had no phone to use either. Francois and myself then slowly....awkwardly....and painfully turned to the customer to ask if we could use his phone to call our employee to come let us out of our own hotel room. One of the house-keepers came and rescued us.

This was not the typical welcome we have for guests here at Seeds of Hope, but it is certainly is typical for life around here as a whole. Thankfully he ended up getting a room anyway and he laughed with us all about it later, so maybe we could implement it in the future as a business method.

DIVIDING LINE

For those of you that have been checking our tumblr blog, everything before this post was taken from that blog. Everything after will continue on this website. If you are confused then just check tumblr and there will be a link to this site.